Skellig Duo's Story
by Tsuki Doriimaa
Summary: After the Wars everyone goes their sepreate ways... Duo moves in with two, then has to leave. Winds up in only God knows where. Something went wrong, his life's being forced away... Somehow the others find him in time... This, is his sad tale...~Complete~
1. Story notes please read before reading t...

Konnichiwa Minna-chan!  
  
Welcome to my new story, a one shot, long one shot... ^_^ Just wanted to give y'all some forewarnings on some things. Well really only one thing.  
  
This story switches POV quiet a lot. Mainly from Duo's to Wufei's and back again. But the other guys are in it to. Not telling more then that 'cause it'd probably give something away. ^_^ Anyways, you can tell the POV switches by the ' ~*@*~ ' throughout the story... and if it's not that, then the POV might switch right after the song lyrics.  
  
I say 'should' because I think I caught all the POV changes and marked them the ~*@*~ so its eaiser to know them... but... ::nods:: Yeah, that's about all you have to know before reading. ermm.. well eh ::hides behind 'er desk muttering quickly:: Someonediesinit,butit'sreallygood!Promise!  
  
Please, make sure you review on it. I'd really, superly love to know what you think about this one. As ya can see by this below...  
  
Started 9-22-02  
Finished 1-07-03 at 4:56am  
  
...I've spent a lot of time working on this one... trying to make it better then the ones I have out that. And I truely believe that it's one of my better writings... And if not better then everyone of 'em out there... then at least my best GW one yet. ^_^  
  
So please, pretty please, reivew after you read and let me know how I did on it. Any suggestions, comments and crit very much welcome (even flames to an extent).  
  
Oh yeah, one more thing... stinkin' disclaimer...  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own GW... we all would, ne? But we don't. heh ^_^ Also don't own the song "Skellig" that's sung wonderfully by: Loreena McKennitt. If y'all haven't heard this song, might wanna check it out. It's really good. ^_^ A sad softy...  
  
Anywho! Enough of my blabbering! Please onward to the story! Happy reading Minna-chan!  
  
Arigatou!  
  
Anime Redneck  
  
--- 


	2. Skellig Duo's Story

Skellig - Duo's Story  
By: Anime Redneck  
1-07-03  
~oOo@oOo@oOo~  
  
  
The day was long and cool, south winds blowing up the southern cliff marking the end of the five hundred acre farmstead that housed the old monastery. Inside those chiseled stonewalls lived the young and old members of the St. Flare Brotherhood. Named so after the town they cared for, Fire Bird Canon.  
  
A name any man would call it odd by a stones throw, but with mornings that rose and evenings that died out like that of a fiery phoenix, it was sight to behold, the name fit it well. Built over two hundreds years before, Fire Bird Canon had managed to remain a relatively small town nestled at the base of two meeting plateaus.  
  
This is where the 'old west' was still lived in times where modernization was spreading like wild fire. The small town and above brotherhood stood outside of that time. A place where the 'wonderers' come on a whim 'just for a look' and wind up settling down.  
  
As was the case for a lad of nineteen, whom was tired of running from his past, running from his memories; a man who wanted to make a place for himself and just live life 'til death came calling.  
  
Arriving in Fire Bird Canon the lad set about finding a place to stay. Old Red's Inn had rooms for rent, seeing as fare was costly and money tight, he took it. There did he stay for a time well spent learning of the place and people. Many did he meet that took a fancy to him, but the boy wasn't looking for anything, just a place to belong.  
  
Before long when time started passing in a blur and money ran out, the man settled down in his seat by the windows edge sighing. 'What to do?' With no money left he needed to find a place to stay for a while. Sure there were plenty of people there that wouldn't mind putting him up for a while, but they also wanted something more, something he couldn't give... something his heart couldn't give.  
  
Head cradled in his hands he glanced up out the window, seeing once more why the town was so named, streets glared back at him in an orange-red glow, reflecting off of windows and doors. 'The name should have crystal, somewhere in it' he mused smirking.  
  
He stood stretching looking skyward, ready to grudgingly seek one of his 'followers' as he dubbed them, to ask for shelter since he could no longer stay at the Inn when it caught his eye. Oh he'd known they were there for many weeks now, but he'd never bothered to look up at the buildings adorning the plateaus edge. 'The Flare Brotherhood.'  
  
Why hadn't he thought of that before!? He'd always been a man of some religion... well sort of... why didn't it hit him to ask for shelter there? He might even be able to live there... he had skills after all; he had to be good for something, right? So thinking the lad jumped up grabbing what little possessions he held and fled from the small twelve by ten room, his heart light with hope.  
  
Many a year had passed since that fateful day where his life changed for the better. He had went to the brotherhood and asked for shelter, explaining his situation and need. Smiling they accepted him with open arms. He had wondered for a time if they'd ever ask him of his past. But as he came to learn, the past didn't matter here. Only who you were and what you did, if you were there for good and have no ill will towards them, they left you be. If not, you were simply asked to leave.  
  
It was a simple life like he'd always wanted to have, but memories wouldn't let him rest fully... always laying in wait at the back of his mind, waiting... waiting for the times when he retired to his room for the night. Then, they would pounce; bombarding him with thoughts, places and people he'd rather forget. Tried to forget. Nooo, he didn't leave on bad terms... exactly... he just... left. To this day he wasn't sure why. Scared maybe.  
  
The years had gone by with him learning under the tutelage of the other Brothers. They're learning's were passed to him, he was soon put to use as a full-fledged Brother, helping the people of Fire Bird Canon in anyway that was needed of him. A life of giving, he gave and they gave back to him when in need.  
  
He loved it.  
  
He had many friends there also; his favorite one was John. A young man not like he himself was when he'd first arrived; live and vibrant with life, ready to take on anything thrown at him. Yet he came to the Flare Brotherhood to learn a life of peace, quiet and helping of others.  
  
John had arrived somewhere around his fourth year of being a Brother. He was to be his first apprentice. And though he wasn't sure on how to take that, being he'd never taught anyone in his short life, he was honored that the Elders thought him ready for such an undertaking. Shy at first the duo soon hit it off, chattering - albeit quietly - of things they both had in common and of things that might have been.  
  
One thing was a common between them even if others flux awaited - you didn't bring up the past, you didn't ask. If the other brought it up willingly, so be it, but you didn't ask. It was something they both agreed upon immediately. Nothing was trying to be hidden from the other, it was just polite that one not speak or ask of such things for one might bring up unwanted memories.  
  
Years had passed since they're meeting, lessons taught and lessons learned, it was a give and take relationship; they learned from one another, but were always there, never breaking apart. As the years passed it left our young man aging and slow in movement, ever fast to give of his quick wit and humor for someone that was down, brightening their day right up.  
  
His hair that once was a brilliant brownish-red was now brownish-black with graceful silvers of silver entertained between, giving him the 'salt 'n pepper' look that many commented, left him as handsome as ever.  
  
He couldn't tell though... his once vibrant eyes, which held they're own magic, were now a dull blue-gray... seeing nothing. Hands, which could curve a horse from trees wood, were now wrinkled with age, still holding onto that strength, but being unable to use it for the sight was gone.  
  
They, him and the Brotherhood, didn't know what was wrong with him. He was now in his early-late years, twenty-eight to be exact, but his body aged rapidly, leaving him looking like a man in his early sixties, crippled by sight and age, bones weak.  
  
The Brotherhood couldn't fathom what was causing the rapid aging process, they'd never heard of it but once before... it was a very, very rare occurrence.  
  
There was no cure.  
  
With help from John he was still able to limp down the halls outside, where he'd sit on a bench or lay on the earth for hours listening to the birds call, winds whisper and lone wolfs howl. There he was able to let his feeble old spirit soar with birds, or run with the wolves, there, he was free from his earthen prison.  
  
But there too, was he able to ponder upon the past. The people he left behind... the people he loved. Often he wondered if any of them had gone searching for him. Wondered if they cared enough to do that for him? But he knew... he knew deep within his heart that they had searched, they had turned over ever stone they knew of to fine him.  
  
But they didn't know of this stone; they wouldn't fine him. Ever.  
  
That thought alone saddened him. There was so much he wanted to tell them! So much he'd still to say! He didn't want to leave this realm for the next without departing to them - someone - of his past, his regrets... His tale.  
  
Ohh but what tale was that? He couldn't kid himself. Over the many years he'd stayed there, learned, taught and... lived. Age had taken its toll on one other part of his being... a part that he needed to relieve himself of before it was completely gone. His memory. What a tale he could've told too! But now... now his memory was old and faded, holes were eaten away within the inner sanctuary.  
  
~ * ~  
O light the candle, John,  
The daylight has almost gone,  
The birds have sung their last,  
The bells call all to mass,  
~ * ~ * ~  
  
That's why he needed to tell someone! He needed to tell what he knew. What he thought, learned, everything! He needed to unload the parts that burdened him over the years. Oh lonely solitude that called to him chained him to his past. He had friends, yes, but no one really knew of Him. Knew what made him come to Them, give up his seemingly young life to join Them.  
  
So in those thoughts, the need that struck him one cool autumns eve while lying outside on a navy blue felt blanket, wrapped up, lost in his thick brown robes. He nodded his head agreeing with it. He would tell of these things that weighed down his young-old mind. Yes, he would tell his dearest friend... he would tell John. He was good lad; he'd listen to the old fart even if it weren't asked of him.  
  
'Gods be kind to the boy, he's taken such good care of me in my old time... Do well by 'im.' He sent up a short prayer, a hope, to whomever was listening to him that night, before John came out and retrieved him, guiding him back to his chamber.  
  
"Are you well Brother? Need anything before I take leave?"  
  
'What? Time for evening mass already!? But you can't go! You can't leave me child! I have need of you!' his old mind shouted out while his mouth formed a tight line, head shaking no.  
  
"Alright then, I shall see thee in the morrow. Sleep well Brother." With that, John made turn for the door, stopping in mid step turning shocked jade eyes to the seemingly frail man laying helplessly on the bed. A seemingly frail man who held quite the grip on his wrist. Sometimes he forgot the real age of the man, and that he was fated to an early death, by something that held no name, but sped up his aging.  
  
"Brother...?" he inquired, worry etched in the word.  
  
Faded blue-gray eyes trailed from where he was sure his hand held the others. On a last thought, he shot out blindly grabbing for the others; it was only the luck of the Goddess that he was able to grasp it. "Stay..." he whispered, "...please..."  
  
Worried for his friend and mentor, John turned slowly lowering himself into the maple chair beside the bed, "Brother... what ails you?" His heart hurt... something wasn't right...  
  
"Please stay... sit and listen..." mouth opening and closing making a smacking sound as it quickly went dry. He smiled gratefully towards the boy as he felt a glass being pressed to his lips. "I need to tell you... of my past..." he crooked out.  
  
"Brother you don't-"  
  
~ * ~  
Sit here by my side,  
For the night is very long,  
There's something I must tell,  
Before I pass along,  
~ * ~ * ~  
  
"Child be still!" cutting him off firmly. He hated to do that, he never had before, but he needed to get this out of his system before leaving. He had to. "It is my wish... a wish of an old man to have his tale told... burden lightened..." smiling softly in the others direction, "Humor an old fool?" He wasn't that old, just aged faster, but he liked to joke on it.  
  
John could do little more then nod, seeing how much this meant to his mentor, how could one not grant such a wish, when he could see clearly in the old faded eyes, the need for release? Grant him this he would. "Aye Brother... that'll do... that'll do..."  
  
"Thank you..." taking a breath gathering his thoughts the other held fast to the hand grasped in his, "When I was young, about your age when you came here... I was fighting a war..." a pause as the other gasped, "...A war that seemed there was no end. We fought, and fought, but for what? For people to die while we risked our lives for peace that might never come?"  
  
"But the last war-"  
  
A rueful smirk, "Who's telling this story?"  
  
"Sorry."  
  
"Accepted. Now where was I? Oh! Then..."  
  
~ * @ * ~  
  
Sometime later there came sounds of shuffling feet outside the chamber door. Whispering voices seeming to argue over something before a sigh was heard.  
  
"You should go! Be with him... we'll wait."  
  
"But we all-"  
  
"...just go... please. He needs you."  
  
Silence.  
  
They'd been having this discussion practically the whole drive over, and still, I argue with them. What's the point? I know eventually they'll shove me in the room rather I want them to or not. I say we go see him together, but its not to be with a stubborn group such as we.  
  
A voice from inside tugs at my heart, its slow haggard tone spoke of lonely isolation and... it couldn't be! We're not that late! Why? Why has Fate decided to play with our lives like this?!  
  
The voice stops and coughing starts. I flinch. Why? What's happened here? That doesn't sound like the person I know, the person they say is here. But yet, in my heart I know this is so. It is he, the one that won't leave me be. The one I've searched so long for. What has happened to him?  
  
The door opens slowly and I watch as a young man came out pale, with teary eyes. He stumbles a bit, whipping quickly on his robe sleeve. As if sensing he's not alone he looks up at us, questions in his eyes. I can see though that he wants to leave that room. Why? Faintly I can hear one of the others explaining why we're here to him, whom we've come to see.  
  
He nods whispering something back before scurrying off to some unknown place. Lightly shaking my head I turn from his retreating figure to those of my friends, "Well?"  
  
"Its him..." his eyes are sad, almost guiltily so, "...he's in there..."  
  
"You can see him... stay with him... talk to him..." the quiet one speaks.  
  
"We." I correct them both. We've all come this far to see him; we should all go in together.  
  
They shake their heads slowly, "No. Just you, now go" the muscle of the group starts pushing me in the direction of the open door, courtesy of the silencer. Throwing a brief glare over my shoulder at them all as I walk forwards into the dimly lit room.  
  
So bare... two high shelves laded with books hugged the north wall, next to them on the east wall stood the large twin sized bed where the young man laid calmly, as if asleep. Next to his bed stood a night stand with water pitcher and glass. The other walls were bare but for his closet.  
  
Standing still by the door in silence, I just watch him, taking in his appearance and state. He looked fine. Like I remember him, just aged a few more years. If anything, he's grown more beautiful over the time apart... but he's older then any of us look... He edges upwards, trying to sit up while reaching out for the glass, groping blindly for it...   
  
Something in my heart snaps... such pain...  
  
Eyes soft, concerned, heart aching with each step I take, my slipper covered feet making no noise to alert him to my presence. But he knows somehow, he can sense it. My heart lightens at the thought that he still knows me, can feel me, after all these years... "John?" he asks sending it crashing back to the ground.  
  
'He's blind!?' mentally screaming I step closer yet, taking in his opened eyes... they're not the lively violet I remember... they're a dull blue-gray now, sight taken from him. 'Why?' I must sound like an ignorant child if any ever heard these thoughts, but I don't care. If such a strong man, in will, body and soul, can turn into an helpless man in so few years, then I think I've a right to act childish for once in my time.  
  
Sitting in the now vacant chair I take the searched for cup into my hands, gently placing it to his lips. He smiles thankfully, slowly placing his hands over mine, with a start he stops sipping, I pull back on it. He shakes it off, whatever it was, then tugs the glass closer once more.  
  
~ * ~  
I joined the brotherhood,  
My books were all to me,  
I scribed the words of God,  
And much of history,  
~ * ~ * ~  
  
"Did I ever tell of how I got here?" he asks.  
  
I smile. No, he's never told me, I still don't know. Didn't even pay attention on the way up here myself, I wanted to tell him... but I didn't. I sat back watching him closely as he settled back down.  
  
"No." I finally give my answer.  
  
Slowly his head turns to look in my direction - not seeing anything - my mind sourly reminds me. That look in his eyes again, he knows.  
  
"Your not John." He states it; it's not a question.  
  
Gods his voice is the same, it hasn't changed a bit, still light and strong, almost musical if not for that underlining command to tell him right. Should I answer him? Would it change anything? If I told would he hold back information that might be important to us? To me? Once more shaking my head I decide not to answer him. If he's truly the same, it wouldn't matter who I was.  
  
"Your not John..." again. I could remark smartly on that, but refrain from doing so as he sighs, "...but that's alright man, I need to speak to someone about this... John was sad when he left wasn't he?"  
  
I nod forgetting he couldn't see the action, "Yes... yes he was..." I answer closing my eyes... Why were they getting fuzzy?  
  
"My fault..." a whisper, "...please tell him I'm sorry for that... I don't want to make anyone sad... but a sad person only knows sad tales. Well most do. Do you mind?" his voice turned serious with some humor to it.  
  
I chuckle lightly, something I haven't done in years. Honestly? "No, I don't mind at all."  
  
"Good. I don't want to make someone else sad."  
  
You might anyways.  
  
"Mind hearing of a guys past?" he asks lightly, "Know it ain't exciting stuff probably compared to some others, but its good all the same... I mean-"  
  
"I don't mind. I'm a good listener." I'm sure the others can hear also. He smiles.  
  
"Thank you." Thoughtful look there, "...well... I fought in a war; the last one we had..." he starts off on his tale while I sit there drinking in each word unknowingly scooting the chair closer to his bed  
  
~ * @ * ~  
  
"...well... I fought in a war, the last one we had..." I start to explain again, hoping this time I really won't make someone else sad. I hated seeing people sad, mainly when it came to being sad over me. I wasn't worth it. But if this person said he'd listen and not be sad... then I'm game. I try thinking of where to go with this though. There's too much to tell... and times short.  
  
Well I guess anywhere's fine, doubt this guy has somewhere to go if he's in here with me. Goddess that sounds sad. I chuckle mentally while thinking of another spot to start at. Everyone knew of the war... oh, there we go! A place I haven't been in ages... Literally.  
  
"During the wars I fought, I fought along side four others, my friends, my brothers, but above all... they were my family." pause, "I've never had a family, not that I can remember anyway." I chuckle of the next, "I found them one by one, or rather some found me. heh Found the 'mean one' first... we soon dubbed him the Heero 'Perfect Soldier' Yuy, always one for completing his missions without fail. A cold hard ass that always acted like he didn't give a damn about anyone." I smirk, "I took great pride in annoying the hell out 'im! That was my job in life..." I pause as the unknown man chuckles, such a deep rich sound, "...annoying the Perfect Soldier. But we all knew... knew he had a heart and cared for others. If he didn't, why fight?"  
  
Smirking I think back to those times, "I was always under threat to be shot from him. Gotta love 'im though, he wouldn't do it. I think he liked me annoying him, at least then he knew I was out of other troubles... or it was one of the few constants in his life he was sure of..." shaking my head, "I don't know though... no one knew much about him, but we loved him anyways. We were all one big messed up family."  
  
With dry lips I start to go on, "Then there-" and stop as he bring the water glass to them again, such a gentleman. I smile thanking him before continuing, "Then there was Quatre and Trowa... heh you couldn't keep those two apart for nothing! Oh they tried being secretive about it all, but we other three knew they liked one another. It was cute. Even cuter was right after a battle when we're gauging the others status, you could watch them on the view screen, silently asking if the other were okay." Chuckle, "Gotta wonder if they ever got married, God knows - well Allah in Quatre's case huh? - knows they should.  
  
"Trowa was so quiet though. It was funny watching him and Heero be in the same room looking at one another. You could almost see the air part between them like silent words were being thrown back and forth. I remember sitting there, narrating what one was saying to the other. It was funny!" my voice cracks, "... Until they both glared at me, then I knew it was my que to leave the room. heh That was them for ya. Never figured out what Tro' was though, always called him an Amazon, sure is tall enough ya know? Short little Q-man's an Arabian, strange couple, but I can't talk. As long as loves there, right?"  
  
There's no answer, had he left? No, no he didn't leave me; I can still hear his breathing, long and slow, as if trying to act normal. What's wrong with him?  
  
"Very much so."  
  
Ah there's the answer from him... but why's he sound so... down? Small shrug, oh well, guess he'll tell me if he wants to, I'll listen if I can...  
  
"The fifth one of our group" briefly I wonder if I could talk about him, "...was something else. A Chinese boy about my height all wrapped up in Justice and Honor. Can't blame him, for others it might of seemed weird or crazy to go around sprouting off on the dishonor of this or the injustice of that. But for him... for him it fit so right. Chang Wufei..." my breathing speeds up a little at the mention of his name... so long since...  
  
"He was the Solitary Dragon of the group. I loved annoying him also." My old grin appears once more, "But that's a different reason then why I annoyed Heero. Heero it was just seeing how many times I was threatened and if he'd actually carry them out. Since I'm here, you can see he never did. Wonder if he'd threaten me now... if he knew where I was... huh."  
  
I chuckle again between small coughs, more waters offered. Thanking him I smile, "Now Dragon boy threatened me too! See I'm a nice guy; I don't hurt anyone. Why am I always the one being threatened? Why's no one like a cheerful clown?" the other does something that speciously sounds like a snort-chuckle. I raise my eyebrow but continue. "Difference in him and Heero was Heero threatened to shoot me, Wufei threaten to chop my precious braid off!!" grabbing it I wave it around for show.  
  
"I miss those threats... and his eyes, such deep ebony pools... You could loose yourself in them. I know I did. heh I never found my way back from them... My heart." My voice was sad, felt my braid move, but I paid it no mind as I waved an arm lightly, "But I said I was going to tell of other things... not sad pasts... Well not all of that anyways... Don't want to bore you."  
  
A sigh then deep chuckle, "Speak as you wish Little One, I won't judge, nor condemn your words. I'll listen and nothing more."  
  
~ * ~  
Many a year was I,  
Perched out upon the sea,  
The waves would wash my tears,  
The wind my memory,  
~ * ~ * ~  
  
Boy he sounded like someone I knew once before. But I'm thankful for that, at least I got someone that won't be sad on me and cry like John did... poor John... I'm gonna miss him. But this new person... something... something was familiar.  
  
"You know before I was a gundam pilot in the war" I pause expecting to hear a gasp of shock, but get none, "I sailed around on a scrap ship? It was fun doing that; there was one for space and one for the oceans. I loved that one. I knew later that I'd be in space fighting for any amount of time, so I stayed with Howard on the ocean ship." A pause, "Ever listened to the seas movements? They're easy to put one to sleep, I know it never failed for me."  
  
"It calms the ailing soul." He comments.  
  
He's right, it is calming, though back then I didn't have an ailing soul... or maybe I did and didn't know it? I think it was just loneliness though. "Yeah, there was only one other thing that could calm me like those waves could though... I loved that thing dearly... But anyways... We stayed on that sweeper ship for awhile going from coast to coast grabbing whatever debris and information we could to help our cause."  
  
I shake my head, "Howard didn't know it then, but he'd be a major help to the gundams when things got tough, mainly mine, Deathscythe Hell and its pilot, me, Shinigami!" I let out a crackled old laugh I hadn't used in years. It was as if telling someone all of these things, that didn't seem to make sense to him I'm sure, freed me from my 'grown up ways' and shifted back into my youthful days.  
  
Aging sucks.  
  
"Deathscythe Hell, Nataku and Wing Zero were the best gundams we had! But shhh! Don't tell anyone I told you that!" a muffled 'What!?' sounded from the other side of the door but I paid it no heed thinking it was just someone passing by, "They're all good gundams, but I loved those the best."  
  
A short chuckle, "Did you now?"  
  
"Yeah I did, guess I was closer to those two then the others... but I liked them more. I remember after the war was over I moved in with Wufei and Heero, so I'd stay with them and have a place to be. Trowa and Quatre moved into one of his many 'houses'." I snort "Houses my ass! Those were mansions! How does he call those houses? Well guess with twenty-nine sisters they'd be a house to him. Aw well...  
  
"We moved in together, it was nice, big three bedroom, two bath apartment on the upside of town. Even though we all had the money to pay for it on our own, thanks to said defeated army, Quatre insisted on paying for us with the excuse that we were family and he wouldn't have it any other way!" I laughed at that, "The boy was so rich after the war finally being over and taking control of Winner Enterprises, he just didn't want us spending ours... the idiot."  
  
"You're the baka..." Came a whisper near my head, startled I turned towards him sure my eyes would show shock and surprise if they could, but instead I knew they were dull blue-gray orbs staring at him. I couldn't have heard him right... Noo, it was just my ears playing tricks on me... had to be.  
  
~ * ~  
I'd hear the ocean breathe;  
Exhale upon the shore,  
I knew the tempest's blood,  
Its wrath I would endure,  
~ * ~ * ~  
  
"The time we spent living together was nice if at all possible we grew closer then we were when fighting... two quiet people and a talkative goof that loved picking on them. Strange combination, ne?"  
  
A chuckle, "You could say that..." I could hear the smile in his voice.  
  
"I loved to fight though. When I fought there was a rush of adrenaline pumped through my veins making me want to go on more, to win. Heero did it because it was his mission. Quatre and Trowa for the better future. Wufei in the memory of his late wife. Me? I did it for few reasons, a better future so no one else was needed to fight and die, to protect my new family, and the thrill of it!"  
  
I wickedly smirk at that, "Death was a tempting call, but Shinigami knew no greater challenge then to fight a deadly battle and come out the victor. It was great, and sad in a way."  
  
"You won them though."  
  
His voice was soft yet strong that time with something else in it I couldn't place my finger on. Why did it sound so... admirable? Did he fight too? "Yeah I did, but still... I didn't like taking the lives I had to... Innocents that got in the way... soldiers on the wrong side of the battlefield." I shrugged as best I could laying down.  
  
"They fought for what they believed in."  
  
"I know, but..." ah what to say to that? Yes everyone battling had something to believe in, something they thought was worth the chance at death to protect or build. "They had peace now, so must've been worth it, eh?"  
  
He didn't answer that time, didn't expect him to really. There was just something to him that told me he wouldn't... Gods it was driving me nuts! I have this feeling that says I know him, yet I don't remember him... or... Shit I don't know!  
  
Sighing I try to sit up again wishing dearly to see this mans face. If I could just see his face I'd know! I'd know what's bugging me, that's telling me this feeling. Damnit all!  
  
I shouldn't have worried though, the guy was a gentlemen for sure, "Let me," he says before soft, caring hands, are at my sides helping me to sit up, water glass pressed to my lips afterwards.  
  
~ * ~  
And so the years went by,  
Within my rocky cell,  
With only a mouse and bird,  
My friend; I loved them well,  
~ * ~ * ~  
  
"Were you ever caught... during the war?" He asks with an air of knowing in his voice... nearly sounding... amused?  
  
Wha-? OH caught... Yeah, guess everyone's gotten caught in the Wars. "Yup! And the captors regretted it afterwards!"  
  
He laughs, "I can somehow believe that" a deep rumble in his chest, he's leaning on the beds edge, I can feel it, where the thin mattress shifts. His eyes must look sad though; it's in his laugh, the shady mist surrounding him changed from a vibrant blue-black to a cerulean blue... the almost sad color that surrounds people when something strikes the sorrow cord within them.  
  
Amazing what you notice when you loose your sight.  
  
I smile evilly, "What can I say man? You didn't want to have Shinigami as your prisoner. When you did though..." the old cockiness came back, "All hell breaks loose! Literally! 'Cause when you captured me, it was only time before I got out, any of us got out." I thought, "Ya know it wasn't supposed to be done, but we'd break the others out if they couldn't make it on their own... There was a constant threat that someone would spill the beans about us if we were... But shoot dude! Ain't none of us would ever do that!"  
  
"Aye."  
  
"I remember one time when Wu-man and I were captured... something was going down up there in the control room or something 'cause our air got cut off... I was being a pain by complain' about how it was 'So not cool!' to die like that. While he was being as cool as a cucumber! I mean the man had gone into a trance or something! He was barely breathing, AT ALL!"  
  
I chuckle remembering it, could hear him trying not to. At least I think he was trying to hide it. I smile, "I was scared though, when he did that, I thought he'd die first. I didn't want that... couldn'tve bore it if he did..." my voice hitched, felt a strong warm hand squeezing my own, "...I realized though... he was saving his strength and breath like that. Wish I could have done that... but he... he looked so dead!"  
  
"Its alright..." he murmured, "I'm sorry..." Why was he apologizing?  
  
He sounded so sincere when he spoke, like it was his fault I was scared for the other pilot. It wasn't though. "We got out of there finally, when whoever was fighting switched the air back on and doors slid open. I was so happy! I was alive and kickin' and Wu-man! Wu-man was back to moving around, ranting at me and just... being him! I remember that day so well... I had wanted to jump up and down hugging him, but he'd of cut my braid off if he had his katana with him." I grin.  
  
"Probably."  
  
See? He sounded so sure of that answer there too! Who is he? Damn my eyes! "I just couldn't loose him. I wouldn't be able to loose any of them, they were my family you know?" My face contorted into one of sadness I knew and his hand tightened on mine. So comfortingly, "I guess... If I lost one of them... I think I could have made it through, 'cause the other three would be there for me... But if I..." I wanted to cry telling a stranger something I couldn't even tell who I wished I could, "If I lost Wufei... I'd... I'd die inside..." it came out barely a whisper, I wondered if he heard me.  
  
He squeezed my hand tighter; guess so.  
  
"He was... my life line back then? I really liked the dude. Aw, but you don't want to hear about that do ya?" I smile squeezing back his hand lightly.  
  
"Did I tell you how I came here yet?"  
  
~ * ~  
And so it came to pass,  
I'd come here to Romani,  
And many a year it took,  
Till I arrived here with thee,  
~ * ~ * ~  
  
~ * @ * ~  
  
I can't help but to smile at him again, it seems that my smile never fades when I'm around him. It's a wonder though, since my face is usually set in an eternal scowl when he's around. It was all for show, I know now. I knew then, when we lived together with Yuy. I don't know why I didn't tell him though. Honor? Or just unsure if the feelings would be returned? I think that was it.  
  
Imagine it, the strong, Solitary Dragon afraid of telling feelings to another in fear of rejection... look what that got me.... grrr damnit all! I'm the baka here... not him. Duo...  
  
"Did I tell you how I came here yet?"  
  
He asks me again... His minds not as well as it once was, is it? Guess that comes with the rapid aging he's going through... "No, you haven't told me yet." I answer knowing I would've gave the same answer again and again, if it were just to hear his voice.  
  
He smiles tenderly at me. Ancestors above, what I'd do to see those twinkling violet pools once more. Why him? Why did he leave us? Was it me? Yuy? Why? Ancestors, that's all I want to know... want to have him back with us. Should I tell him it's me? He seems to sense it's someone he knows... I just can't bring myself to tell him though... I sigh... blast it all...  
  
"You sound like someone I knew, ya know?" Chuckling softly I shake my head, raven locks ruffle across my shoulders and his arm, from where my head is laid on crossed arms, watching him. The words send my heart beating faster in hope? Ohhh let him remember! Notice... everything... please Ancestors... I've never asked for much in my life. Please, I ask this one silent thing...  
  
"I Left from 'Fei and Heero's place one September morning... it was hard doing that. Standing in the doorway to his black, navy blue and hunter green sanctuary... watching him sleep... So beautiful..." he takes a deep breath steadying his racing pulse.  
  
I try to accomplish the same task.  
  
"He looked so... serene, sleeping like that... heh He was curled into a semi-ball hugging the dark 'n golden-silver clad comforter to his chin... smile gracing his usual taunt frowning face... it was... Special..." he smiles that smile not many are lucky enough to witness... the type that are true, from the real Maxwell, not his Shinigami jokester mask he always wore.  
  
And sighs, "But I had to leave... I couldn't stay there anymore..." Why?! Desperately I want to shout the question that's plagued my mind for years on end... Why? "...I hurt to be there... Oh it wasn't 'Fei's fault or Heero's... I loved them both so much, it physically hurt to leave 'em!" he frowned, "But I needed to get away and see if I couldn't find something else... or get myself together... something, I don't know!"  
  
His fist clenches in anger at himself. Ancestors above he's cute even when upset... How I love him and have missed him so... If only... I shake my head... too late for the 'If onlys'... I can only squeeze his hand back in a comforting way. I hate this... the tearing inside of my chest gets worse as he goes on.  
  
Now he talks about long walks and taxi rides to villages, towns... places I've rarely heard of before. The others and I spilt up all those years before, Winner taking a leave of absence from WEI to help us search for the Braided Baka... Four young men, searching the four winds, for the lost 'runaway' ex-pilot and to no avail; we turned up nothing. Three years... Three long, heart-saddening years... which were virtually wasted in search after search, turned up nothing!  
  
~ * ~  
On dusty roads I walked,  
And over mountains high,  
Through rivers running deep,  
Beneath the endless sky,  
~ * ~ * ~  
  
I kept searching after the others had given up... Couldn't blame them for it though, life had to go on. If Fate so decided, we'd meet up with him again... but by the Ancestors the wait was slowly killing me... Literally. Refusing to get up some mornings, not going to work, stopped eating...  
  
Yuy... I feel bad for it then... the not-so-Perfect-Solider anymore, was worried for me... I hadn't wanted to worry anyone... I just couldn't stand to be away from him any longer. His smile, his laugh, his grins, pouts, jokes, teasing... Everything! I missed them all... ached to hear and see Him again...  
  
Softly sighing I close my eyes to the rumble of his tenor voice... He always could weave one hell of a tale to tell. The Baka... Gods how I've missed him... I could sleep right here if I weren't afraid I'd wake up to see that the anonymous tip we received, that led us to him was all a wicked nightmare... Like so many before which kept me up through the nights... Almost ashamed when the worse ones hit, sending me flaying from my bed to floor, almost silent screams emitting from my mouth unheard to my own ears.  
  
Heero... the Godsend for those times, would rush into the room, gather me rather gently from the floor to his arms and take me back to his room, where he'd proceed to cuddle me... heh picture that... to his chest trying to whisper calming words to me... You had to give the man credit... for being someone that wasn't supposed to have emotion, he handled those times like he'd done it time again... Had he dreams like that? I shake my head sadly... I didn't know then... still don't know now... But I do know he put up with a lot from me back then, when I went through depression...  
  
Lets face it... someone you love disappears from your sights, for years on end, without word one as to why... You're going to be depressed... There wasn't any stopping it... After the first three years of being strong, searching for him... I literally crumbled in on myself...  
  
Heero picked up the pieces though...  
  
Then the tip came as to where Duo would be... even a description of him down to his devilish smile!  
  
Happiness... giddy... excitement and a thrill I hadn't known in almost three decades raised within' me as the news came. All those were an understatement to what I truly felt. Smiling goofily I remember jumping from the kitchen table, giving Heero a soaring kiss, then running to my room slamming the door to pack. And laughed... Ancestors above did I laugh after realizing what I'd done and the look on his face. Priceless!  
  
"Do you remember that?"  
  
His joyous voice pulls me from the memories roaming the vast mind roads. Huh? No, I don't remember... I smile to myself... What was he talking about again? I only knew that we were off the subject of how he came here and he was asking if I remembered something...  
  
Wait a minute... Picking my head up to stare at his lifeless blue-gray eyes in shock... he didn't just... But his eyes... Ancestors above! They were brighter! A tear slips by my guard. Is he...? But how... And what?  
  
I shake my head again in a stupor, "Not really." I offer knowing it sounded lame, but what was I supposed to say? 'Yes I do' to something I can't even remember his asking of? Riiiight... wouldn't be honorable.  
  
"The Food fight? Ya know..."  
  
I should know. How can one forget something so messy! It took me three days to completely clean the kitchen; I forbid him and Yuy from entering it 'til it was cleaned properly. Then he had to bring the fact of 'Where else would you like me to have one? The den?' up... Gods no... the kitchen was great! Please hold another one there... just leave the den out of it!  
  
Laughing with a nod, "Yes, I do!" Smirking I remembered it took him pert-near three hours to get all the food from his hair.  
  
He laughs back grinning from ear to ear.  
  
My heart soars. Please let it be true... he's remembering! Seems he might not yet remember to which of us he speaks, but I do not mind a damned bit! My Duo's coming back... hopefully, or maybe he believes I'm another of the Brothers?  
  
Crossing my fingers unconsciously I lean in closer to better catch his words, thumb slowly stroking the top of his hand comfortingly. Though, which of us I was trying to comfort, was a good guess.  
  
~ * @ * ~  
  
Clutching tighter at the arm in my grasp I feel an overwhelming need to cry at the pain in my chest. So strong... heart winching... And worst yet... is I can't tell whom its coming from... almost as if it's coming from both of them! Allah... the torment those two have been through over the years, even during the Wars...  
  
Its sad, watching - rather listening and feeling - what the two behind that solid oak door talk of. Almost funny watching as Trowa shouted 'What!?' when mention of the best gundams came. I just smiled already knowing what our self proclaimed Shinigami thought about them all. It was cute really.  
  
Heero takes a peek through the door, making sure all is well, but he shakes his head. Doesn't look good. Oh sure they're in there talking up a storm, even for someone as weak as Duo looks. No, I haven't seen him yet, but I can feel it... a curse of having this Space Heart of mine... Empathy is hell at times... Feelings so strong I can do nothing but grind my teeth together, sometimes cry, wishing the others pain away...  
  
Trowa stands against the wall beside me, jade eyes closed, he almost looks asleep, but I know he's keep silent watch over everything. Heero joins us on my other side after checking the door. It looked, like it was my turn to play now. Oh Allah that didn't sound right... But at times, you can not help but feel as though your just playing a part in someone's vast theatrical performance.  
  
Someone once said, "*The world is but a chess board. We all play our parts." Remembrance of when it was spoken slips my mind now, yet I wonder, if the one who stated such a line, knew how close to the truth they seemed? Don't we all 'just play our parts'? Game called Life.  
  
Nodding to myself slowly releasing Trowa's arm to push away from the wall and heading... heading to the place I hopped I needed to go. I wasn't sure where the office type building was set up. Never been here before. So, thinking it best, if at all in the least, I would run into another Brother, or John maybe... I headed the direction he left.  
  
It took me about twenty minutes, the Brotherin was a large complex, before I stumbled upon a building with someone in it. Seemed it was time for evening Mass, no one was present roaming the vast halls. Slowing my steps turning in the others direction. Slowly pushing the heavy wooden door open it revealed a Brother in the same heavy roves that Duo was clad in, though a shade lighter, shifting books around on an antique desk. I didn't wish to disturb him, but what was needed was immensely important.  
  
Having heard my footsteps he turned towards the now open door where a stranger stood looking unsure of what to say... What did you say to one in times such as this? I never had to experience someone dieing. My mother died delivering me... my father when I was fighting a war... I remember though, my sister... before the meteor my father was on blew up, saved me from the blow. One move which in the process switched our positions, causing me to slam into her as she flew into the shuttles wall... she... she died in my arms...  
  
Shaking my head, blinking eyes to clear away tears that aren't needed now, I slowly step towards him, still lost on what I actually needed to discuss with him, if he were even the right man to speak with.  
  
Some thirty minutes later I was walking fastly towards Duo's room once more, a watery smile upon pale lips. I was happy for the first time since arriving in this overly sunset town, yet... yet my heart was heavy with emotions... my own and those of my families. The strong ties which bind us, transfer feelings easily, for me anyway.  
  
Two pair of eyes turn on me as I come to a stop catching my breath. Any faster and I would have been running. Should have arrived back quicker, but one looses his way in such a large place. Duo would laugh at that, I know, if he knew with all the mansions I owned. I got lost in this place.  
  
I nod, "All is set" looking towards the door. That was all that was left to deal with. I wondered, not for the first time, if he knew yet. What was going on out here, in there... everywhere around him. I hadn't seen him yet, grazed his face... just felt their emotions... saddened souls were in that room. But there was hope yet; fleeting hope waved its rainbow colored flag at the edges of their auroras.  
  
"Heero, please?" pleading with my eyes, what my words could not. Gratefully he nods turning towards the door, pulling the heavy mass of wood open like nothing, silently entering the room, the door closing just as quiet behind him.  
  
Allah please...  
  
~ * @ * ~  
  
Someone's entered the room. I try not to make notice of it, but I think my ear twitching to the new sound gives it away. Why I even care is something I can't figure out. There's just something... about all of this, beyond my own predicament, that's... familiar, somehow. The 'how' is slowly eating away at me. Driving me batty. I'm almost to the point I'm going to flat out *ask* what's going on. But I won't. I trust them for only Hades knows why.  
  
Footsteps pad over to my bed with soft thumps, not at all like the man's at my side, his were quiet as whispers, never head 'im comin'. Cloths shuffles, mattress shifts as the man moves, to look at the other? Don't know, but they're whispering now, or well, the new guy is. "...ei, time to go..."  
  
Hm what's this? We're leaving? Someone schedule a fieldtrip and not let me in on it? I let a small grin cross my lips, looking towards 'them' yet not seeing. For a second, I could've sworn my vision cleared a bit, but no... all I see is their auras still... Seconds though, mere flashes of outlines! Shinigami was a cruel one at times, teasing my poor young-old soul with false sight.  
  
"...o?" hm uh-oh, went and spaced out on him again... I'm so tired...  
  
"Yeah?" Wow hey, my voice sounded more awake then I actually feel.  
  
"Would you like to accompany us? We have something prepared for you, if you'd like to come see it with us?" the kind, soft baritone voice filled my ears, warming my chilled body. 'Us' wanted me to come with them? I could ask just who 'Us' was... but nah! What's the fun in that? I may look an old wrinkled man, but damnit I'm only twenty-eight! I'd take some adventure anytime... seems though... times not truly on my side right now...  
  
I nod, smiling now, "Yea!" voice cracks a little, he offers more water, "Lets take a trip 'n get out of this ol' stuffy place. Ya know? I haven't left this place in ages it seems..." the mystery of it all was starting to give me some energy, but... It didn't matter... as much as I felt I had... my eyes just wanted to droop shut...  
  
"Come on then." A harder, trying to be soft voice stated. He sounded like someone I knew too. heh This really is getting interesting. And here I thought I'd die the old fashioned way. Alone and cold. Nope, not Shinigami! I'm goin' out in style. Death with adventure. That's always been my way. Death always has had a tempting call, but I was never ready to give in quiet yet... Still not... Not until, this last adventure's over with... not 'til then...  
  
The bed shifted, weight lifting up then back down as strong muscled arms, warm against my robe covered body slowly lifts me from the bed as if I weight nothing at all! Probably don't come to think of it. One beneath my back, the other my legs, I feel the tall man turning for the door. He didn't stop to open the door, so that other guy must already of opened it. He's about the same height I can sense it.  
  
Softly sighing for lack of anything else to do, I lay my head against a broad shoulder, closing my eyes to the world around us. Only when the gentle sways of movement stopped minutes later did I open my eyes, flashes of three body outlines flooded my vision. Blinked, and they were gone. What was going on? Damnit this isn't nice! If I'm blind, I'm blind. If someone else wants or has the power to let me see... then damnit do it! Don't screw around with me like that! I know there's people here, I can hear them whispering and as much as I wanna know who they are, confirm what I think, then damnit no teasing me like that! It's just wrong.  
  
"Injustice!" I lightly murmur forgetting I was leaning against a shoulder, mouth near the jasmine smelling man's ear. Chuckling lightly sure I'm blushing some at the comment, 'cause if it's who I think... hell, 'smell' it is... then he got a kick out of that one... heh Think I'll just keep quiet now until someone talks to me. Not like there's a need for anything to be said right now... it's so calm...  
  
~ * ~  
Beneath these jasmine flower,  
Amidst these cypress trees,  
I give you now my books,  
And all their mysteries,  
~ * ~ * ~  
  
~ * @ * ~  
  
Feeling the winds breeze as the door opened I knew it was Yuy coming for us. It was time to leave this place. And while I am glad to do so, I am worried that Duo wouldn't want to come with us... Why I couldn't fathom...  
  
"Wufei, time to go..." his voice so soft, almost as if he's trying to keep it where the braided man on the bed before us wouldn't hear. But he forgets, as we all tend to at some point now, that we're all ex-gundam pilots, trained as the best, you can't make a noise without us hearing of it. Duo heard him, no doubt. How much though I wonder, seeing his response as only half grasping it.  
  
"Duo?" question softly.  
  
He seems a little 'out of it' or in deep thought over something, I'm not sure which. "Yeah?"  
  
"Would you like to accompany us? We have something prepared for you, if you'd like to come see it with us?" His eyes widen slightly in surprise. It's probably been a long while since anyone has visited him out side of the Brotherhood, let alone have something for him, something special. And it was special. So very much so...  
  
"Yea!" reaching out for the water glass refilling it, I place it against his lips hearing that wonderful voice crack with dryness. "Lets take a trip 'n get out of this ol' stuffy place. Ya know? I haven't left this place in ages it seems..."  
  
I chuckle lightly at that. Yes I know love... so very long since you've left, hasn't it been? Far too long, "Come on then." Nodding to Heero in acknowledgement, I stand bending over to wiggle arms beneath the slight form on the bed. Eyes shine with amusement when he squirms a bit, seems he's still a little ticklish. Lifting him into my arms he snuggles deeper into my hold, laying that angelic face again my shoulder sighing contently.  
  
It's so good to hold him again. He lays there still 'til I stop moving, nodding silently to Winner and Barton. They're eyes widen at seeing the frail form in my possession. Weight loss and accelerated aging shocking the poor boys. It wasn't right, I agreed with them on that. But some things we could not change. This sadly, was one of them. We could only make good with what time was left.  
  
It wasn't long now. I chuckle, wanting to laugh out loud as my favorite words pass through rose lips, "Injustice." Yes, it was... the greatest kind which Fate or Destiny could ever have a hand in. Injustice, was loosing so much time apart... only to find who you've lost, and see that so much more then originally thought, was stolen from you.  
  
Time is a precious thing. Right now, it's not something we had a lot of. "We can go now" I inform the others, still gazing at the man in my arms. His time was soon... my sight wavers watery once more... I can feel it in the air... it's thin and cool, he's so light and fragile. Ancestors above, why!?  
  
"Yes, lets hurry. Please, this way, I'll bring the jeep around." Winner smiles sadly as he runs off, Trowa after him, I sigh as Heero falls into step with me. I sound like a child again I know it.  
  
"Why Heero?" he only shakes his head, peering down at the boy I carry. He doesn't know why. No one does. Doesn't mean we - I - can't ask why. Slowly, almost as if he's scared, one hand reaches out to run through salt 'n pepper locks, gently brushing them away from the pale face.  
  
He loved Duo to. We all did. We were a family. Yet none were closer to Duo then we were. It was strange, the bond we had. Or, was it just strange at first? I can't remember anymore. Honestly don't care anymore. All that does matter I know, is that we have it, know it's there... that's all that matters anymore.  
  
Times running out for anything else to get in the way... stupid thoughts don't help, but I can't keep them from coming! I was denied a childhood. The one I had with my clan was not as a child. Forced to grow up early, shoved into my schooling, later taught to pilot Shinlong... I never had childish thoughts before. Now, seeing Duo like this... going through what we did, what I did, to find him... I figure for once in all my summers, I'm allowed to think like a child. Right?  
  
Shaking my head, silken black strands of hair softly fly through the air, brushing against Duo face, making it scrunch up cutely as it tickles his nose. "After you" smiling slightly, shifting Duo in my arms, I carefully climb into the black jeep, Heero after me in the back, Trowa in the front with Quatre driving. Knowing it's a long ride, I follow Duo's example, leaning my head on Heero's right shoulder, eyes drifting closed, loosing myself to sleeps beckoning call, the last thing I felt before being pulled under, was the Japanese man's strong arms sliding around my waist.  
  
Slowly, something was drawing me from my slumber... something warm and moving. Yawning, one eye cracking open staring in front, then to the side, I saw what it was. A smiling Heero, running fingers through my hair. Giving him a tired one in return I looked past him, seeing we were at the airport already. Duo was still asleep in my arms.  
  
The jeep door opened revealing Trowa standing with Quatre. We each nodded towards them we were coming. At Heero's suggestive look, I shook my head; I was too tired to argue with him anyways. I hadn't slept the night before, nor on the ride up here. Sleep was demanding it's due. Stifling another yawn I carefully started scooting my bundle over to his awaiting arms, following him from the vehicle as soon as he left out.  
  
Boarding one of WEI's private jets Heero found a row, giving Duo the window seat so he'd have something to look at if he awoke during the flight. Yes he was blind, but even the suns rays could penetrate those dark depths he was forced into. Offering me the middle seat I thanked him falling into it tiredly.  
  
"Baka" he murmurs leaning over to clasp the belt for it, my hands fumbling but not catching the lock. He's right, of course. I am stupid, should have slept more... I just couldn't though. The excitement of seeing Duo again was too much; I was wired for the almost day's flight here and three-hour drive from the port.  
  
His fussing over me in that soft monotone way of his. Smiling at the memory I can picture Quatre sitting across from us giggling at the 'Heero Hen', Quatre's version of Heero being a mother hen. Cute. A little off for the ex-perfect soldier, but cute. Like I said, we all had a bond. His, Duo's and mine were the strongest, different. Strange things were bound to happen with any three of us being together, as different as we are.  
  
"Arigatou" whispering thanks for many things as the engines started up and we lifted off. Another sigh, a contented one, escapes my lips as I lay my head against his shoulder, Duo's falling against mine as the jet turns. "Baka" and something warm covering my hand are the last I remember before sleeps embraces me once more.  
  
When the next I awoke, it was to the soft jerks of plane meeting paved runway. Yawning looking towards the window past Duo, squeezing the hand in mine finally notice it's well into the night. Smiling softly I turn eyes to Duo, sitting there staring out the window at nothing. It still sounded sad to my own self, that he couldn't see anything... but there was another meaning to it, there really wasn't anything to see out there. It was one lone runway behind one of the Winner estates. What we had planned needed to wait 'til the morning it was too late now...  
  
"Duo" that salt 'n pepper head turns my way, smiling as he always is. Life never gets him down, not that he'd let the world see it. But he always smiles around us, even not knowing it's us... Or does he? Couldn't help but wonder if he really knew it was us or not, the way he went so willingly... Duo would never go with anyone willingly unless he knew he could get out of it. It just peeks my assumption more that he knows.  
  
"Hiya" he sounded like he just woke up himself, I chuckle ruffling his bangs with my other hand. His eyes open; his smile widening as my breath catches mid breathe. They were... I blink a few more times, double-checking that my eyes weren't deceiving me. Yet his never changed, so they were not. Ancestors above strike me down if his eyes airn't getting color back to them. They're more violet-blue now, then the blue-gray. I send up a little prayer of hope.  
  
My own smile grew as I asked, "Sleep well?" while squeezing Heero's hand in mine, nudging his shoulder getting a grunt in response. He version of 'What?' Chuckling I nod towards Duo, watching from the corner of my eye as he peers at the boy searchingly, his eyes twitching, lips tilting upwards. So he saw it to then? Good, I wasn't loosing my mind... yet.  
  
"Mmm... yeah" that goofy smile of his, "W'ere er at?" a yawn, "Not n'ce of y'all bookin' a fieldt'ip n' not tellin' meh 'bout it." Laughing at his sleep slurred voice and pouting lips I help him to stand, carefully navigating him through the rowed chairs.  
  
"Gomen nasai Duo..." Heero starts from my side shaking my head, "It was top secret information, strictly to be released on a need to know basis. And you didn't need to know." He smirks.  
  
"Awwww... but that's not fair!" Duo whines cutely, bottom lip poking out a little. I smile; he really is too cute at times. He'll never grow up, not even when his body forces it on him. "Hee-chan's mean! You plan something for me and then not tell me about it! Why ya gotta be mean to me... no one loves me..." that whinny voice goes on, his own lips curved upwards, the largest knowing smirk I've ever seen on his face.  
  
I really... wasn't paying attention to it though, just, staring at him in disbelief. When had he figured it out? Did I miss something while sleeping? Arching a brow eloquently at the man before me, "You know?" that was lame.  
  
~ * @ * ~  
  
"You know?" Smiling wide I nod, trying not to laugh as my mind forms what their faces must look like, shocked n' thrilled at the same time. For the two quietest, must look funny on 'em. Damnit I want my sight back! I sigh closing my eyes lean towards the jasmine smelling Chinese man, embracing him.  
  
"Hiya 'Fei... been a while, what keptcha?" feeling his arms tighten around my waist, smiling into my neck. Something wet drips onto my shoulder momentarily stalling my thoughts. Fei was cryin'?  
  
"'Fei?" questioning him softly I feel his head shake against me, free silken locks tickling my nose as I look down at his head damning my sight again. I know he's there, can sense his aura, watch it flux with his emotions, but I can't *see* him. Sometimes though, I can see outlines of things... sight flickering... I can only hope I'll get it back, but that never happens... and with my track record for that sort of thing, I'm not counting on it.  
  
"Y-you know" his voice was muffled in folds of the robe, "you know its us... you remember..." He didn't think I'd forget them, did he? Tightening my hold around his slim waist I wait. "We- I... we searched for you... baka..." being called that again brought a smile to my lips. So it was he, I told all my secrets to. I knew it was, in my heart. "... for years..." he sniffles stiffly pulling back a little to wipe at his eyes I'm guessing, feeling one arm being freed. I know he didn't want the others to see him like that.  
  
"I'm sorry..." looking down I feel bad, really bad. I never meant to harm anyone with my leaving, even with knowing that it was bound to hurt someone. I didn't think it would as much as it did me. Watching them both sleeping peacefully before leaving.  
  
"Three years" that deep monotone soundly oddly soft comes closer to us even if his aura was only next to 'Fei's. "We searched for you, baka." The light around him, usually a hunter green in color, brightened a bit, his voice went down a notch, "Leave again and Omae o koruso".  
  
I laugh hugging him tightly as well, soon engulfing them both together "Never... Hades' own beckoning couldn't carry me away." Smiling breathing deeply, that sent that only Heero held, woods and cinnamon.  
  
Water once more slapped my shoulder where robe exposed skin. Startled, I closed my mouth stopping the words that I was about to say. That liquid, that tear, was from Heero's shoulder... Glancing from between both auras to his at my left, I hug him tighter to me. Heero never cried. Never in the years we'd known each other, not once, even self-detonating could not bring water of any sort to squeeze through those non-caring eyes of his. Yet, this was a different situation, wasn't it?  
  
"Aww come on guys..." try lightening the air, "I'm sorry... really I am... I didn't plan to be away this long... I didn't know... I'm sorry... f-for everything..." I was gonna cry now if they didn't stop. I wasn't ready for the others to know I was back. heh Well as back as I could be anyways, knowing who I was with now.  
  
"Why you leave, Duo?" the soft voice from Heero, his head turning to face mine more, still nestled softly on my shoulder, 'Fei's on my right. We've really gotta look mushy. Refraining from laughing at it instead running fingers through his hair thinking of how to answer that. There were a few reasons... even I wanted to know now, years later, why.  
  
I didn't know what to say to him. "I... just couldn't stay any longer..." that was a crapy answer, same I gave 'Fei back in the room. "I really don't remember why I left now... Sad, ain't it? Not to remember why I left the two I loved... it really is sad..." I shook my head, tears starting to gather, "I just... needed to get out of there... Why, I don't know now, I just remember that it hurt... but I can't think why it hurt... ya know?" Gods help me, I feel so stupid! A child's answer for leaving...  
  
"It's alright..." 'Fei whispers for the two of us to hear, "You're back now. That's all that matters." He pulls back from me, Heero following suite, "If you even leave again..." voice goes deadly soft, the hint of loving threat in it causing me to smile, "Omae o koruso!"  
  
That time I did laugh. I felt more alive then I had in years. Giving a nod, holding out my arms to them, each taking one we start walking. "You have my word..." a tear slipped down my cheek, soaked up by the robe I wore, "Even if Shinigami comes to call, manages to steal my weathered young soul, I shall never leave you both." That was a promise, their auras brightened and dimmed.  
  
They were happy I'd stay as long as I could. But the knowledge that time was not on our side, weighted down their souls. Weighed down my own... I didn't have much time left. I knew that now, knew it for the past week. I had thought, like everyone else in the monastery, I'd die an old man alone in his Brotherin. heh Fate was being kind to me though. It was by no small fete the ones I loved, above all else, found me once more.  
  
I was going to die. Nothing could change that fact.  
  
But by the Gods, I was going to die at home... with the people that loved me.  
  
~ * ~  
Now take the hourglass,  
And turn it on its head,  
For when the sands are still,  
'Tis when you'll find me dead,  
~ * ~ * ~  
  
~ * @ * ~  
  
Exiting the plane we walked through the large hanger towards one of the three Gators* parked outside the front. I climbed into the driver's seat, Duo beside me, Wufei behind him with Trowa and Quatre in the back, cranking the engine we started for home.  
  
It took us fifteen minutes of relative quietness to reach the estates mansion, the airstrip stationed a good distance from the house to avoid any sort of damage. I have to shake my head at the image called up for that thought. Duo, deciding he was able enough - which we all were, but given his joking record and attitude, we decided it safer to keep him away from it - to fly the jet wanted to try. Wufei and I protested against it, but Winner's heart is just to soft. He let the boy fly.  
  
Don't get me wrong, Duo can fly, the best out of us five. He can do maneuvers that leave you thinking, 'How'd he do it?' That was Duo though, Ace in the Sky.  
  
Said Ace decided it would be fun to give us - or mainly the poor Arabian - a scare. Approaching for landing, just flying over the mansion he pushed the controls forward diving down, only to pull them back at the last minute flying upwards avoiding the massive house by scarce feet I'm sure. One was able to hear his laughing from the passenger compartment. Quatre was white for days after that, refusing to let the American anywhere near the hanger again unless escorted.   
  
Chuckling from the memory ignoring the curious look Duo gave me, his head tilted to the side looking at me, mouth set in questioningly smile. The color of his hair now, salt 'n pepper, didn't change his look any, I finally take the time to notice helping him from the Gator. It gave him the 'grown up' air that he other wise, would never had gained aside from his growing taller or face loosing it's chubbiness. It made him, if anything, look more beautiful then ever.  
  
"Goodnight guys... I trust you to sleep well" Quatre walked forwards, watery eyes and smiling as he pulled Duo into a tight hug. He didn't know yet, that Duo now knew with whom he was staying. And we weren't going to tell him he knew, not until he was ready to. I had a gut feeling it wouldn't be long. Knowing Duo, he had something planned. Being able to only see darkness wasn't going to stop that mischievous mind of his.  
  
"G-goodnight..." an honest, soft stutter returned by Duo as he hugged back. Trowa silently walking over placing hand on his shoulder, squeezing lightly before gathering the tear streaked blonde up, heading towards their room. We stayed out on the porch swing a while longer, just sitting.  
  
Wufei sighed from his place on the other side of Duo, head resting on his shoulder once more, sleep was calling to him, the fool. Shaking my head at him, hairs tickling Duo's nose on my shoulder. Wufei hadn't slept in nearly a week. Ask him about it and he'll tell you its been a day since he's slept. Wrong answer. Nearly a week he's went without sleep, the time he has gotten only being around two hours a night. Nightmares kept him up, refusing to let him rest.  
  
Moving my arm to rest on the swings back, careful not to disturb Duo, start to slowly run my fingers through his hair; it calmed him. Most nights - virtually all of them after he had renounced his searching of the braided one, had nightmares holding his dreams hostage... caging him in eternal fright. The only remedy, which seemed to work, was pulling his small shaken form from the floor to my arms and bed, where I tried best to smooth him back to sleep. I did not mind trying to comfort him; after all I came to realize I did... love him.  
  
It had been a startling realization for me to admit after the Eve Wars of living together with Duo. I shook my head again, one night watching a movie with the two of them on the couch, either side of me. Sometime during the movie, they had maneuvered to lying curled up beside me, heads resting on either leg watching the movie. I seemed to stop breathing for a minute when I noticed the position we were in, I didn't know what to do. Should I move them? Let them be?  
  
A voice in my mine whispered no, let them be as they were. Oddly enough I did as it suggested, sometime later I was almost, almost, shocked to find my hands alternating between smoothing down Duo's braided hair and running through Wufei's loose mass. It was then, in that moment, that I realized I loved them both. Had smiled and went back to mindlessly messing with their silky hair while trying to piece together what I'd missed of the movie.  
  
We truly are a strange group. When Duo left, and we searched 'til out hearts couldn't take more, it hurt. A part of me, of us, had left that day, three years ago. It hurt worse now... that we had that missing, lovable piece back... only to learn we'd be loosing him again...  
  
To Death... Shinigami... Hades' servant...  
  
Have you ever loved someone and lost them? Ever loved anyone at all? They never tell you it hurts. Never having emotions, or knowing you had them and never used them... turn around and find out that you love two different people. Accept that fact. Then one of them leaves for no known reason. It hurt, beyond what one could describe. I didn't know how to handle those emotions, so I threw myself into work, into searching and into trying to comfort the only other person that could comfort me. Strange, how under everything that has occurred in our lives, that we have not gone 'crazy' with it yet, how we've still lived and hoped.  
  
Ah but my thoughts are rambling now... sighing I look over the two in my care, their both asleep now. Soothing hand through hair lulling Wufei to peaceful dreams, steady heartbeat the cadence calling Duo down. I find myself shaking my head more often these days and now as I figure out how to get each upstairs and settled in. Wufei could very well walk up, but he needed sleep. Duo needed too, yet slept on the plane... I didn't want to wake either of them. Frowning slightly coming to a conclusion I eased Duo's head from my shoulder, simultaneously slipping a hand under Wufei's to keep him from falling over as I ease off the seat, laying Duo down.  
  
Quietly scooping the Chinese man into my hold I kick the screen door open gently making quick work of going upstairs, preparing the sheets, depositing the cargo on the bed before rushing quietly, back downstairs to retrieve the other precious cargo, closing the door behind and repeating the process before sliding into bed with them. Holding them close as I started to feel sleeps becoming call... the last conscious thought running through my head before fully answering that call, was of not wanting to loose him again... not again...  
  
~ * ~  
  
Morning brought its predawn light shimmering through the navy curtains to dance lazily across my face. Frowning in annoyance I shifted pulling to large masses closer to my sides. One such mass giggled snuggling closer, if that was at all possible. I cracked open one blurry eye to see which dared laugh at me this hellishly early in the morning. I didn't feel like waking - a first in my life, yet knew it'd happen anyways. The one laughing quietly only drew me more towards wakefulness.  
  
Blinking at the sudden light, I looked from one lump, identified as a sleep China man, hair flayed about him like a dark halo - to the mass on my other side, soon identified as the smiling violet eyed boy named Duo. Whom was currently still giggling at me. Frowning at him, shoving down the want to smile at the cute picture he posed, I snaked the arm around his waist upwards, thumping him on the back of the head smirking.  
  
"Hey...!" he rubbed the spot like it had actually hurt him. Right. His head was too thick for such a notion. Shaking that salt 'n pepper mane, braid swaying side to side he stood uncertainly, legs wobbling beneath him.  
  
Slowly removing Wufei's hold on me, "Be careful..." shifting his head from chest to pillow I stood reaching out grasping Duo's arm, steadying him. He smiled, gave me a hug and kissed my nose, violet eyes twinkling before motioning at the door, moving towards it and out. Leaving me behind. It took me a few minutes, blinking rapidly, replaying the moments from when my eyes opened to his. There was something...  
  
"*Utsukushii... kare no me..." realizing what had caught his attention he swiftly went out the door looking for Duo. He didn't have far to search as the door closed softly behind him, Dou stood on the left of it, looking around lost. Which, having not been to this estate before, he understood. Not being able to see for years on end also didn't help.  
  
Smirking as I took his hand in mine, feeling it smaller then my own he smiled. "Yes?" I knew that look.  
  
"Where's Quat' and Tro's room at?" the seemingly angelic boy asked of me, smile still alight in the dimmed hallway. Eyeing him I listened for sounds of movement, only hearing our breaths. So they were still asleep then, no one else was at this estate but for them five.  
  
Watching him yawn sagging against the wall, I knew he was still tired, legs too weak to hold him long. Wrapping one arm around his thin waist I led him down the halls. He probably would have slept longer... but then...  
  
Shaking my head I stopped in front of a intricately carved red oak door, "Their in here" keeping my voice low with knowledge that the couple wouldn't be up for another two hours normally.  
  
"Thanks buddy!" Arm reaching out for the handle, feeling around a bit he found it turning quietly the door swung open silently. I watched him curiously, my thoughts about to be tested. Yet more so, I was interested in what the braided fool would do. He couldn't stand long on those legs alone, so what ruled out any jumping around, he'd simply crumble to the floor... so what...?  
  
He crawled onto the foot of the bed, slowly moving upwards like a panther stalking it's pray, his small rear swaying in the air, form as graceful as ever. Something's age couldn't take away. He moved more, 'til only a few scant inches away from both their faces, heads being almost touching was an easy thing to do. He cast one glance over his shoulder towards me, large smile plastered on that cherub face.  
  
"Ohhh Quat... Tro-man... time to wake up..." his singsong voice floated through the room, pair on the bed only shifting a little. "Quatre... Trowa wakie wakie!" Voice rising a bit now as he leaned back on his legs, I could see that smile broadening as bodies shifted once more, never taking notice to the extra weight on bed.  
  
"Yo!" He nearly shouted throwing his body forward, hands slamming into the mattress just under their heads, "I said WAKIE WAKIE!" he burst out laughing quickly snapping back in time to miss colliding with the two heads that shot up like they'd been laying on hot coals.  
  
"Wha-ahhh!! TROWA SAVE ME!" Quatre's breathing was rapid, deep breaths. "What the..." looking around blinking a few times he finally noticed the face grinning like a Cheshire cat. "DUO!"  
  
Trowa's green eye shifted from Duo to me, a nod before back to him, "Hello Duo" his voice quiet, sleep drugged and humorous.  
  
"Hey guys! Time to get up! I wanna know whatcha got planned for me!" was the happy greeting he gave. His eyes were happy, sad and tired.  
  
"DUO!" Quatre I believe was having problems grasping that the American was in bed with them, gave a rude awakening and... I nodded, he just figured out he called them by their names. A smirk, baka. "What's going on?" Voice behind me pulls me from the conversation going on as arms wrap around my waist.  
  
"Wake up call" I murmur back.  
  
A chuckle, "I see it was successful." I nod, "So can he?" Glancing over at the head propped on my shoulder I raised a brow. There were several questions that could attain to. "See, I mean?"  
  
Ah, yes that one. "I was wondering that myself" I whisper back starting to pick up on the conversation once more. My guess was, that Duo could see again by some miracle, how much he could see, was what I wanted to know. He still gazed about as it blind, which leads me to believe that only half his sight has come back, enough to let him make out shapes, slight colors.  
  
"You remember us!"  
  
He smiled, "Q-man I never forgot you."  
  
"You can see?" Trowa asked tentivly reaching a hand out, running careful fingers over closed eyelids. "Can't you?"  
  
Duo gave a small nod. "Sortta... I can tell who you guys are, what's goin' on and well... muted colors of stuff..." a shrug of his shoulders, "But that's about it, I'm still blind I guess... Don't know how, but I ain't complain'!" he laughed falling backwards on his back waving in my direction. "Hey 'Fei-babe!"  
  
I chuckled at the new name as Wufei stuck out his pink tongue playfully in turn. "Bite me Maxwell."  
  
"Sure bring it over it here." He grinned everyone laughing at him, even myself. I just shook my head at him. For someone dieing, he sure was happy. But... my smile dies a bit; I could understand that happiness in it. He was dieing yes, but he was with his family.  
  
"We need to get ready." I reminded them strolling over scooping up the still laughing braided mass and walking from the room with Wufei following, tugging on Duo's braid trying to get him to stop laughing. He was only succeeding in causing himself a coughing fit. Reaching the room, carefully placing the drained boy on the bed, Wufei offered him water, holding the glass for him as he had in his room at the Monastery.  
  
Duo knew how to weave a great mask as well as tales to tell. He would never let the blonde Arabian know how much this was slowly killing him - pun not intended, to keep acting happy and 'normal' for him. He did seem to have more energy then when they first saw him, but it wasn't lasting. He could only act for so long, just like standing, he couldn't do it much longer.  
  
"Sorry guys..." his voice was sounding weak again in between gaps for breath, his coughing attack and playing wake up call having drained him.  
  
"Don't be, baka..." Wufei pulled some clothing from the chest of drawers laying it aside as he sat by him; I squatted in front of him, watching him concerned. "Shouldn't push yourself Duo..."  
  
A nod, "I know... I'm s-sorry, ju-just wanted to-"  
  
"Not worry them, ne?" Finishing the trail he was heading on.  
  
"Yeah... Q-man wo-worries too much about people..." he gulped in another lung full of breath, "I'll be fine..."  
  
Wufei stared at him hard, seriously, "Are you sure?" he asked, both of us grabbing a hand in some silent thought I've still yet to figure out. At times it seems we've got ESP, reading each other's thoughts before acting. It's always been that way between the three of us.  
  
"For now" just as serious, looking between the two of us, "I am." That truly did nothing for easing our nerves. "Come on guys... I'll be fine... I'm not leaving y'all, I promise." He smiled sadly.  
  
Yes, you promised didn't you? But you can't keep it. No matter how much you say you won't leave us, no matter how much you fight it. You know, we know, it's a loosing battle. My head dips down. We've never lost a battle, never... yet this... my vision swims... this is one, we cannot win in.  
  
"Hey... hey Heero...?" His voice is worried, sliding down to kneel before me "Heero?" uncertainty and worry now; one finger goes out lifting my chin, another tear trails down it. I feel almost foolish, loosing tears over this, after a life of no emotions. "We will loose you..." I manage to whisper out, going limp as his arms pull me forward in tight embrace.  
  
"Oh hey... come on now..." hands rub circles on my back as more unstoppable droplets fall from closed eyes. So childish I feel. "Heero, it's alright..." He sounded like he didn't know what to say, weight lifting from my head a second before being put back, think he looked towards Wufei for help, I'm only guessing, the arms that wrap around us both only confirming the thought.  
  
"No it's not..." was that my voice, cracking weakly like that? "We finally found you... now..." shook my head, arms raising to hug them both. Gods above why I act like this I don't know. Emotions are an enigma to me... All I know, is that it feels like someone's pulling pieces from the organ known as my heart... his leaving... I shook my head again, nuzzling his neck.  
  
Arms around my waist hugged me tighter, "Now, we're loosing you again..." that soft baritone reverberates against my side, "Duo... how..." he trails off as something seeps through my shirt, wetting my skin. "How... will we..."  
  
Sharp intake of breath above me, Duo's heart sped up at the implication the unfinished sentence held, "Come on guys, I'm not leaving you, I promised I wouldn't!" he quickly went on, voice becoming deeper with emotion, "I love you both... death can't keep me away..." final squeeze, "Come on now, we've gotta get ready" my words back at me, "...for whatever y'all have planned... It's ok." And he released me standing up, back on the bed looking over the clothes Wufei placed there.  
  
Looking to Wufei he nodded, one last tightening of the arms before he stood also, helping Duo into his old clothing, smiling softly as the other exclaimed on how he missed wearing this type of clothes. Something about robes being to drafty. I smiled chuckling. He also had a way for breaking up tense times.  
  
Wondering around the room some time later looking for a lost shoe, somehow it had gotten moved from where I last put it, I glanced around tracking it down. How had it gotten on the desks top? Sighing in exasperated wonder walking over to retrieve the offending item. I sat in the chair there leaning over slipping socks on before shoes. Standing up I looked over at Duo.  
  
Spiraled out on the bed almost asleep he lay dressed in his black jeans, blood red shirt with zipper neck tucked into them, black jacket thrown over him, and his black combat boots completing the outfit. Looked as good as he always would.  
  
I smile turning to look as Wufei exits the joined bathroom, steam following in his wake. He wore his traditional Chinese suit he always loved with their puffy legs that allowed for maximum movement aside from wearing shorts. This suit was different though, it was a navy blue that was almost black, the buttoned coat to it having a silver Shinlong dragon twisting through golden clouds, jaded orb grasped in one sharp-clawed foreleg, complete with black slippers.  
  
I myself was dressed in one of the few shirts Quatre bought last Christmas. It was a winter's camouflage one, white, black, brown and gray, tucked into my blue jeans and boots. We were dressed and ready, now to see if the two love birds were up and over the shock. heh Up wasn't a problem, over the shock was the question.  
  
"Lets go" helping Duo stand Wufei comes over, both of us linking an arm around his waist, helping to take some of the pressure off weakened legs.  
  
"Is it gonna be fun?" Gods his voice sounded weaker.  
  
Wufei mocks shock, "Would we plan anything other?"  
  
"I don't know" he starts jokingly, "It is the two of y'all we're talkin' 'bout here..." he says grinning with a chuckle from the slap in the arm Wufei gave him for the comment.  
  
"Hn" smirking I steer downstairs where the smell of cooked food waifs past us. "Smells good" I can't help but whisper, not having ate since yesterday morning. Walking in depositing our passenger on one chair I swing past Quatre with a smirk and "Morning" snagging three slices of toast from him, ignoring his protests. Nodding to Trowa on the way back to the others I drop them a slice taking up a seat.  
  
"Duo?" Quatre starts from his place cooking today's lunch and dinner breakfast was being skipped.  
  
"Hmm?"  
  
"How are you feeling?" tentivly asks.  
  
Freshly braided hair bobs up and down as Duo nods, "Yup, I'm feelin' good!" I shouldn't be, but it surprises me how he can get his voice to sound to light, happy, as he is. Quatre merely nods setting some more toasts on the table for us all. After he's finished cooking we help clean - Duo being made to sit out, and then pile into the Gator from last night, driving away to some unknown destination, another secret from Duo.  
  
Our trip took us to a hill's top some acres from the mansion, from this place you could see miles around. It was like being on the top of a building and looking out over everything. The rugged almost mountain like landscape providing some beautiful views much to Duo's joy. Hopping from the Gator with Wufei's help he wondered towards the edge leaning against a large acorn tree growing there. "Wonderful..." he whispered easing to the ground.  
  
"Yes it is." Wufei agreed heading back to help unload.  
  
I kneeled beside him scanning the horizon watching various birds take flight, "We thought you'd love this place" murmuring as he pulls me down to sit beside him, the others joining minutes later. It was all we had planned for the day, sitting beneath the acorn's shade, talking of things past, catching Duo up on what he'd missed while away... anything to pass the time.  
Quatre brought a frisbee with him and played a game with us all, I stayed out, the one to watch over the braided baka who was set against listening to reason. He was too weak to be playing that game, his legs barely held him as it was. So I stayed out, watching his every move making sure if he showed sign of falling, I'd get there before he did. Ten minutes into the game had me pulling him out of it. Nearly collapsing on his backside from running that way, I caught him, "You're out" leading him back to the tree blocking out Quatre's yells for him to be careful, asking if he's alright... I waved them off.  
  
Holding him close, his breathe quick and pained, I winced as his coughs started up once more. It tore at me to see him hurting like this. Wufei exited the game leaving the others to a one on one. Sitting the other side of Duo wrapping an arm around his waist, head leaning on his shoulder peering at him worriedly.  
  
Frail smile, "I'm... f-fine..."  
  
"Bullshit!" I blinked looking over the pain bowed head curiously, Wufei? "Stop fibbing Duo." Good choice of words, never say 'lying' when speaking of Duo. Sick or not you'll have a fist flying at you faster then bee's leaving a hive. "You're not 'fine' Duo!" his voice was pained, facing showing it as he went on softly gripping his knee. "You're not... we know it... Please... just stop saying it..." barely a whisper now.  
  
"I'm sorry... I-it's just..." deep breaths, "...hard to n-not ac-act it for Q-man..." I nodded hugging him closer pulling Wufei with. "I'm fine now though..."  
  
"Duo..." I warned him glaring from my shoulder. He may know, we may all know, but I'd still like to say he doesn't know how much this hurts us. He insisted he was 'fine' and stayed that all through dinner. We talked some more, ate and drank our fill. Before long it was time to head back. That was when things started going wrong, the slow downhill spiral he was on escalating ten fold.  
  
"DUO!" Quatre cried mere seconds before I glanced over dropping the basket I carried rushing to his side as he started falling limply, catching him barely before he'd of hit hard rock. "DUO!!" he shouted again running over with the rest.  
  
"Duo!? Maxwell are you alright?" Panic. Gods no...  
  
"Duo..." softly slapping his face a few times, "Duo wake up... wake up Duo..." It wasn't working... Wufei collapsed beside me pulling his body to rest in both our laps.  
  
Tears slid down Quatre's pale face, "Duo please...!"  
  
"nugh..." he moaned, coming back to us, "Wha... what hap-pened?"  
  
"Baka..." Wufei breathed leaning down hugging him then pulling back... "You passed out... fell... baka..."  
  
"S-sorry Wu..." that smile again, "Din't mean t'."  
  
Slowly shaking my head, I knew what was coming. That gut feeling was back in vengeance. "Duo... please..." He couldn't do this to us... felling for his pulse found it feeble. "You can't..."  
  
"He can't what?" Quatre's wavering voice asked from the side. We ignored him.  
  
"I'm so-sorry Hee-chan... c-can't re-ally... h-help it... ya know?" again with the damned smile.  
  
I knew that, but I didn't care. We lost him, found him again and damnit we were loosing him again! In our arms he lays, barely beating pulse, breathing raged and slow... he was fading before our eyes and we were for not on helping him out of it. There was no helping him, which was the sad truth to which we all had to own up to now. To help him live would be to prolong his suffering. A fete which none present could consciously, willingly perform.  
  
Wufei swallowed the lump formed in this throat, "Duo... how... h-how do we..."  
  
"Hmm?" salt n' pepper head turning his direction slowly peering at him tenderly. He wasn't fighting it, was welcoming it, embracing it.  
  
"How do we..." he trailed off, "...live without you...?" I finished for him in a whisper, only the three of us could hear. How does one live without their other half? Loosing a half of three does not make two whole. So how is one expected to live without the other?  
  
His smile seemed to widen a little, his violet eyes shinning with tears, sadness and above them all, love. "You've gotta... li-live t-together 'Fei..." the coughing returned making his breathing raged, "I pro-promised I w-wouldn't leave... a-and I w-won't..." the hand softly caressing the golden cheek fell, energy spent. "I'll always l-love you both..."  
  
"Duo... no..."  
  
Still, that loving smile never faded, not even when Shinigami came to collect his weathered young soul from us, "I love you Hee-chan... l-love you 'Fei-babe..." he coughed some more, "I'll be w-with yo-u... a-always... air, sky... all ar-around... y-you..." his voice faded below a whisper, so low our foreheads were pressed together to hear him, "...r hearts... always 'n f-for...e-ever..." hie body drew one raged breath, letting it out in a shutter.  
  
Then all was still, quiet, but for the sob from beside us. Quatre's head buried in Trowa's chest, body shaking from their force slowly forcing him to his knees Trowa sliding with him.  
  
I couldn't see them though, only what my mind imagined happened with the sounds. My head, and Wufei's was still firmly pressed to Duo's, the braided idiot we both loved... would always love and always remember. Droplets of water, tears, started sliding from our eyes, down cheeks, quietly splattering on the pale cooling one beneath us. Hands clutching to each other, to Duo's still form...  
  
He was gone... he left us again... We were alone, the two of us now... sniffling like a child I never was, releasing the hold I had on Duo's arm to wipe my tears away, staring at them strangely, yet fondly.  
  
Duo had been the one to break the ice around my heart, make me feel... make me love... He taught me things I would have never known had I not met him. For him, I would live on... For Wufei, I would live. I wasn't alone like I was before. I still had Wufei, who loved me as I do him and Duo... Trowa and Quatre to, where there for me, us...  
  
'How do we live without you?' I nod understanding now. We live together, love together, and never forget. Couldn't if we tried, I smile. "Ai shiteru, Duo no baka" the wind kicked up running invisible fingers through wild hair. Wufei sat back, navy blue sleeve silently wiping the tears from his face, looked from Duo's calm form, to me, smiled then looked out towards the open starry night sky squeezing my hand, "Ai wo ni, Maxwell..."  
  
We hurt, but we'd heal in time. Duo would later be buried at that very spot. A simple headstone, image of the grim ripper carved within' the marble block, "Shinigami's song called it faithful home. There he will rest, 'til its song reaches the rest."  
  
...And we would live on...  
  
~ * ~  
O light the candle, John,  
The daylight has almost gone,  
The birds have sung their last,  
The bells call all to mass...  
~ * ~ * ~  
  
  
~oOo@oOo@oOo~ Kyoso suru ~oOo@oOo@oOo~  
(complete)  
  
* I said that, I've got a poem titled just that. 'Life is a Chessboard'  
  
* Gators - ya know, those vehicles almost like jeeps that they use on farms? Ones that have no top, has four seats and a small bed in the back? Well if not, that's what a Gator is.  
  
* "Utsukushii... kare no me..." ...roughly translated means, "Beautiful... his eye..." heh 'me' is 'eye'... that's why I say roughly, was looking for 'eyes', but heh didn't see it. ^_^; 


End file.
